Conflict Resolution Tips To Help Handle Disagreements
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In daily life, conflict is inevitable. Because people are unique, they don’t always get along or agree. The problems arise when conflict is not resolved in healthy manners or when conflict results in violence.
Here are some conflict resolution tips you can use the next time you find yourself in a disagreement with someone.
First, it is important to define conflict. Conflict is defined as an opposition of forces or a struggle that is derived from opposing opinions, needs, drives or wants. Conflict in any relationship is inevitable. The key is to control the conflict without the conflict controlling you.
Communication is a key component to resolving conflict. You must have open communication in order to freely discuss the conflict and identify a resolution that everyone can be happy with. Sometimes, you may need the services of a conflict resolution professional; however, you can resolve conflicts on your own as well. Before talking, set some guidelines, such as no shouting and no accusations. By setting parameters, you are opening the door for discussion.
Respect the other person’s right to have an opinion and the feelings they are experiencing. By placing yourself in the other person’s position, you may be able to get a greater understanding of how they feel and what they are experiencing. This is an important conflict resolution tip.
Another conflict resolution tip is – don’t make demands. Ask questions instead. Use “I” statements such as “I feel this…” or “I don’t understand that…” Avoid “You” statements as these tend to put people on the defensive and the key is to diffuse a situation rather than escalate it. When you focus on how you feel or the questions you have, you are in a better position to communicate your side in a non-judgmental manner.
One more conflict resolution tip is not to focus on just the negatives. Take a cue from office and business managers. When effective managers have to correct behaviors, many will use the “sandwich” technique in which they will give a compliment, suggest improvements and then finish with another compliment.
For example, if a person is always late for work, the manager may say something like, “I see you have increased production in your department this month. I notice there is still some difficulty getting to work on time; however, I also see that you are working well with your coworkers.” By sandwiching the complaint between two compliments, you are showing the other person that you acknowledge the conflict but also you acknowledge his / her strengths.
Yet another conflict resolution tip is to stay calm. No one ever resolved a conflict through shouting. Also, studies have shown that when a person starts yelling, others stop listening. By staying calm, you are able to put forth your complaint in a manner that is non-threatening and professional.
If the matter does get out of hand, end the conflict resolution session. When you see you have reached an impasse, don’t keep pushing the matter. Simply walk away and say that you will readdress the issue later. There is no harm in walking away if the conflict is turning violent or a resolution is not being reached.
Most important, keep control over the conflict rather than let the conflict control you. By following these conflict resolution tips, you can take control of the conflict and help reach a resolution everyone can live with.
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